mend and break
by LiannaAila
Summary: Post ep 22/23. Yona stumbles into someone.


_**Scene: Post-episode 22/23, after the pirate raid. Yona stumbles into someone.**_

 **Disclaimer: I do not own Akatsuki no Yona.**

Yona trembled, fixated. The jeweled handle glimmered faintly in the darkness of his cloak. It was only inches from away, within easy grasp. One pull, one swing. Then it would be over.

Beyond the ringing in her ears, she could hear loud, harsh voices. His own was smooth, unruffled. He was telling them to leave. Her scraped cheek pressed firmly against the silken cloth of his chest. Was his heartbeat fast or slow? She couldn't tell over the roaring of her blood.

She reached for the sword.

Her hand barely registered the smooth, cool surface of the handle before he moved. A firm hand, not ungentle, closed over hers. She stopped breathing. In a second, she fell through a decade of memories. Was this how the Blue Dragon's hand had felt? Was this hand the same one she'd held to sleep years ago?

She didn't know. She didn't know.

After an eternity, after a heartbeat, the voices stopped. In the razor-thin silence, she was frozen. The silken cloth rippled with a barely imperceptible sigh. He was still.

"Do you want to kill me?"

The words hung in the air, in her father's blood. She could not move.

"I understand if you do." He did, after all. He was Soo-won, her childhood friend, her father's murderer, a king. He was not hers. Her Soo-won died a long time ago. Her Soo-won did not exist.

A gust of wind buffeted his cloak, and his hand remained steady against her head. "But, Yona, you cannot kill me yet." His voice was soft, and it was as ugly and as beautiful of a sound she had ever heard. It was weary, and it was unwavering.

He breathed in. "I have something to do."

She was frozen.

In a flick of his wrist, he withdrew. In the whirl of his cloak, sunlight, and her heartbreak, she gazed statue-like into his cobalt eyes.

"I loved you." Her lips opened slightly. "Soo-won."

His eyes were silver in pain. She could see her expression as it changed, reflected. She was cold.

"I have seen many things." She looked at him, bright and beautiful under the cloudless sky. Suddenly, she could breathe. Her smile was empty. "I have killed." Her dagger flashed.

Moments before the infiltration, the Green Dragon had slipped her a spare throwing knife. Somehow, it had gone unused during the raid. The blade glinted dully against his pale throat. All she needed was a sharp edge.

"My father was kind," she said. "He loved tea, and he loved his family. You-" her voice broke. The knife was steady. "You killed him."

Now, Soo-won was the frozen one. She felt no triumph from this.

"But, Kouka is not what I thought it was." The air was still. The sun shone blindly. She shuddered out a breath. She loved him. She hated him.

"I will not forgive you," she whispered. "But I will not kill you now."

The knife pressed against his throat, gently. He did not move.

"I'll be watching," she breathed into his ear. "Soo-won."

It was a second before she stepped back, a breathless, heartstopping moment before she pulled the knife away from his throat. Then, the knife slid back into her sleeve, she released the collar of his robe, and she was leaving.

Away she stepped, and his frozen eyes followed her. She was not his Yona. She left him standing in the middle of the street, her back straight. She did not look back.

Someday, she would be fine. Someday, she'd be okay.

Today, Hak was rushing over, worry tight in his face. Roughly grasping her arms, he checked her for injuries, demanding answers in his usual brusque way. This was still her Hak. Her childhood friend, her protector. He was her Hak.

Today, she let herself break.

oOoOoOo

 **AN: A friend recommended Akatsuki no Yona and I absolutely fell in love. I just poured this out at like 1 in the morning agh. Also, the reason why Yona didn't use her dagger in the beginning was because Soo-won had pinned her left side against him. Maybe I'll post more drabbles. Time to read the manga haha!**

 **Please review, follow, or favorite! Let me know what you think!**


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